Saturday, May 22, 2021

When you have upgraded your Home and the people you live with are intent on destroying it.

Sometimes you wonder ...will this sh%% lockdown ever end? Everyone is at home, in your face, indefinitely. And no matter how much everyone tries to sugar-coat it, having your family around all the time is a challenge. 
A ginormous challenge. 

Mother feeling depressed

Phrases like ....'You are the worst parents and this is the worst Family ever!' get thrown out there by adult children who randomly decide to move back into their parents Home. In the meantime, parents who thought their parenting days were done, are thrown into complete chaos:  clothes and belongings pitched onto floors, bathrooms that are filthy, and driveways that are packed with trucks, and campers and boats, among other things. 


Bathroom with soaking tub, Unsplash.com

The only place left to go is the bathroom, and your vehicle, yes, you can go,  and just go sit in your car. (sounds like someone has watched Too much Cat in the Hat....). You just want to run away from it all. but wait, you CAN'T go anywhere because of Covid and lockdowns. 



If some don't get sick from Covid, they will surely feel the effects of prolonged isolation, and may suffer prolonged mental health issues, depression, alcoholism and drug addictions, and sadly death by overdose. If someone in your family has died, you can't have a funeral as Churches are closed. 

Let's talk about your Home. Since the outbreak of Covid, Home renovations have increased to the point where wood and building supplies have jumped upwards in price. Supply chain challenges have hit every industry and product, which is why this is not a good time to do Home Renos. What renos are the most popular? Decks, Kitchen redos, Bathroom redos, Home Gyms, and Home offices.  House prices have jumped, partly because of low interest and mortgage rates. For most people, their Home is their biggest asset. Which is why it makes no sense when people who live in your Home are intent on destroying it....it takes money, time and a lot of upheaval when doing Home renos. No-one is anxious to redo a room you have already done. 

oak floor being removed

Have you renovated rooms, only to have to redo them after a couple of years? What is your take on this? While your children are growing up, wear and tear of a Home is inevitable, but when they are adults and have moved out, then decided to move back home, it is very difficult. When they start yelling at you, in your own Home, because you dare voice your opinion, then something is very, very wrong. 

Who decided that parents should forever look after their children ...? Until the parents enter the Nursing Home, or until said parents are dead....surely it is not too much to expect that adult children can adult? 

Parents don't want to parent for the rest of their lives, maybe they have things they would like to do, like travel, or learn to paint, or whatever... They have earned the right to some time off. They are not responsible for the choices an adult child has made. It is not their job to FIX everything that is lacking in an adult child's Life. 

woman walking on a beach

Somehow, in the midst of all the chaos, we must struggle to keep our sanity, and to choose to be Happy. Baby step by baby step. Self care is of the utmost importance.
 
'nobody said it was easy' scrabble letters





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